Horsing Around

Admittedly, I know little to nothing about soccer. I honestly cannot recall ever playing the game…ever. When I first started teaching 34 years ago, all my students in 6th grade had played soccer at least one season, and many of them were still playing. My last year teaching, 7th grade then, most had played soccer again at least at one level, but very few played the sport anymore. If observation is any measure, I do not see as many school playgrounds packed on Saturdays with soccer players and parents. I think there was a push for soccer on the world stage where the United States was not very competitive.

But today’s blog relates to a player, arguably the best in the world (not that I would know). Luis Suarez plays for Uruguay, although he plays professionally somewhere in Europe. Every World Cup I seem to hear one or two names of great players. I try to check them out, although I have never watched more than twenty minutes of soccer at one time. He was injured entering the FIFA World Cup, but his team did not fare well without him in their first game. He played hurt in Uruguay’s second match, and scored both goals I believe, or at least assisted in both. He is legitimate, even playing injured.

This may sound rude - there is a point to it however – but I couldn’t help but notice his resemblance to a horse, as I had never seen the man. I would have certainly thought that was where the resemblance ended, but I’d have been wrong. In the next contest, Luis Suarez bit an opponent, like horses do. Uruguay was playing Italy, so perhaps Suarez was craving Italian. I thought Mike Tyson had taken up soccer and had claimed Uruguayan citizenship. However, the Italian still had both ears, so I knew it couldn’t be Mike. My other thought was that perhaps Suarez’s injury was not his knee; maybe it was he could not play during the day without spontaneously combusting, as that’s what happens to vampires exposed to daylight.

I don’t know who Uruguay plays next, but I do know if were an opponent, I would have my cross and my garlic necklace securely around my neck.